Episode Eight: My First Charter

Not only does my airline offer scheduled service to over 100 destinations in the United States, it also offers charter service for a wide variety of companies, organizations, and travel agencies all throughout the year. I've heard of crew members spending three days in San Francisco, a weekend in New York City, and even time in New Orleans on these almost coveted charter flights. For instance, during March Madness, crews at our larger bases have the opportunity to bid for basketball charter trips, and sometimes the trip pairings for charter flights outnumber those for scheduled passenger service.

Our base in South Florida is an intimate group of about forty flight attendants. I was disappointed to see that no charters were scheduled at our base during March; I was anxious to experience the overnights and fun-filled atmosphere these flights offered. Then in mid-March, reserve crews at my base were called to work an unscheduled spontaneous charter to Oregon. Only then did I secretly wish I was back on reserve (shudder).

I had a week off for my birthday (it randomly happened in the bidding process; I honestly put my preference to work the longest four-leg trip as that day's priority, but the software decided otherwise) and after three days off, I saw a post from a senior flight attendant in our crew scheduling portal that she wanted to give away a two day charter flight. I had the days off, and I figured, WHY NOT!? I messaged her immediately and after checking with crew services, I was given the trip.

The charter comprised of a ferry flight from Fort Lauderdale to Indianapolis with the flight attendants, two pilots, a mechanic, and the charter representative, with a fourteen hour layover in the city. The next day we were to shuttle a group of car racing specialists to Alabama and then ferry the empty plane back to Fort Lauderdale. I had never been to Indianapolis (only on working flights) and was excited to see what the city would be like.

On our way to Indianapolis, I was able to sit in the flight deck during takeoff and landing (since there weren't any passengers aboard the aircraft). I had done this twice previously on our MD-80 aircraft, so being in the Airbus A320 during these phrases of flight was something new and absolutely breathtaking. We were welcomed in Indianapolis by one of the fancy-schmancy fixed-base operators (FBOs) catering to private clients. In a private van we were shuttled to our hotel, which was right near the airport.

Pulling up to the hotel, I knew this was going to be a very interesting experience. Apparently, my airline was performing this charter flight to help out another charter airline that could no longer do the flight. Therefore, we stayed in the accommodations provided by the other airline, and let's say the hotel was very much like the one in The Shining.

We were all given suites on the first floor in the "newer" wing of the hotel (which was a lengthy walk through weaving corridors) and I found myself in front of my designated room. I slid the keycard, opened the door, and was greeted by the following:

1. a large suitcase, opened with blue jeans draped across it, perched on a luggage rack
2. a large pile of sheets on the floor
3. a large array of clothing strewn on the bed
4. a large man standing in the middle of the room

"Oh, excuse me. I thought this room was vacant."

I closed the door and turned back towards the lobby. Two housekeepers were in the next room over.

"I am supposed to be in room 106 but it is still occupied"

"Yes sir, it is occupied."

".........okay"

So I trekked back to the lobby with my crew bags in hand. The receptionist saw me come around the corner and before I even announced the problem, she started apologizing for the mix-up. I didn't see the housekeepers with radios, and I didn't tell any other staff member, so I was wondering how she already knew about the problem, but I was focused on getting a different room. She handed me a new keycard and I walked to my new room near to my original one. I had a room with two double beds with a great view of the abandoned parking deck of the old airport terminal building. Sitting down on the first bed to take off my shoes, the mattress sunk right into the bedframe. I tested out the other one and it did the same, albeit a little less pronounced. I decided that after dinner I would request another room change as I yearned for a good night sleep, especially with our 6 AM shuttle time to the airport.

I voiced my concerns to a different receptionist on staff, and immediately replied that the mattresses are air mattresses, so she would send someone up to "pump up my bed." Returning to my room, I decided to call the front desk to cancel the request as I thought I could manage sleeping on the less "airless" bed. However, the phone didn't work, so I called another flight attendant (whose room was equally appalling with water stains on the walls and ceilings and unhinged cabinets) to relay my message to the front desk. Then maintenance man came to the door (of course while I was in the restroom) to fix the phone and bed. The gentleman entered, took the phone, pushed a button, hit it, and then said it was fine. I again declined the offer to pump up the bed because I was pretty sure I was losing my sanity. To top it off, I turned on the faucet in the bathtub to take a shower, and that came off in my hand. No shower for you!

Another flight attendant and I decided to uber to Downtown Indianapolis for a little while to experience the city. We walked along the hipster part of town on Massachusetts Avenue which was pretty live for a Wednesday evening. It was exciting to be in a different city and see what it has to offer even for just a short period of time.

The next day, we worked the short charter flight from Indianapolis to Alabama, and then ferried the aircraft back to Fort Lauderdale. I again was able to sit in the flight deck for landing in Fort Lauderdale. We flew along the coastline, turning towards the Everglades, and made a 180 degree turn to line up for runway 10 left. Arriving around noon, the airport was not as busy as usual, but the chatter on the radio was incessant and captivating.

Even though the accommodations were interesting to say the least, working my first charter flight was such a rewarding and enjoyable experience. Being in the flight deck during takeoff, climb, descent, and landing was like being a kid in a candy store. Plus spending time walking around a new city was equally fun and exciting. Maybe in the near future another senior flight attendant will think of me, a lowly mid-senior new hire, and offer their charter trip. I'll just have to wait and see.

Episode Seven: The Cup

I can't think of a great introduction for this story, so let's just begin:

It was the return trip from Michigan to Fort Lauderdale and I was working as the lead flight attendant in the forward cabin. The gentleman arrived at the boarding door in a wheelchair; he was, what crew would say, a 'customer of size." Standing by the boarding door, I offered my hand to the gentleman as he raised himself from his wheelchair. He graciously accepted, and as I helped him into the cabin, he stopped in the middle of the forward galley and let go of my hand.

"I have seat 1F," he stated.

"Great," I replied, "you are right here in the front row."

"I'm not going to fit there. You need to find me a different seat."

"Okay, sir, we will try our best to accommodate you." I smiled.

"I need to use the restroom."

I pointed to the lavatory directly behind him in between the galley and flight deck while questioning my own sanity as to this exchange and how we were already out of orange juice from the previous flight. I focused my attention back to the new wave of passengers coming down the jetbridge as general boarding had commenced. 

We were expecting a completely full flight---177 passengers with carry-on bags makes for a slow boarding process, no matter how many "welcome aboard" announcements I make on the PA system.

The gentleman emerged from the lavatory and stood in the galley next to me. In his hand was a small, white coffee cup, like one would get from Starbucks. He turned to me and held the cup about five inches from my face.

"This is my urine cup," he triumphantly exclaimed. "You see, I'm too big to use the facilities on the plane. So I pee in this here cup and dump it in the toilet."

I really didn't know how to respond, and wasn't sure if asking why he didn't use the facilities in the terminal instead was appropriate customer service, so I just smiled and said "oh, great, okay." He again reminded me that he would not be able to fit in his assigned seat, but I had him stay there for the time being as boarding continued. He coughed, cut off a woman, pushed by a small child, and took his seat in the first row at the bulkhead. Once boarding had finished, I moved him to an aisle seat in a free row so he could be more comfortable. He passed me by to visit the on-board convenience during the flight as I ate my breakfast in the forward galley; he stopped to smile and shook his cup. 

Fast forward one week. I was rostered for the same trip up to Michigan. On this flight, I was working as flight attendant #2 in the back of the plane. While assisting other passengers during boarding, I noticed the same man standing in the middle of the aisle not allowing other passengers to pass by. 

"Sir, please take your seat so the other passengers may board."

"Steward, you need to find me a different seat. I won't fit in this one."

Instead of having seat 1F, he now had 16D in the middle section of the cabin. I told him I would help find a different seat, but for now, he had to take his assigned seat and step out of the aisle. He complied and boarding continued. 

"I remember you," he said as I stood a few rows behind him. "We did this last time," he laughed.

"Yes. We did." I was not laughing.

After boarding was complete, he decided seat 16D was fine, so there he remained for the flight. I told the rest of the crew members about his escapades from last week. They could not believe that urine cup guy was actually here. 

Towards the middle of the flight, the gentleman got up from his seat and began making his way towards the back lavatories. I could see a cup in his hand, but this one was different. He had upgraded to a clear plastic tall drink cup, and I was pleased to see he was doing well for himself. Hiding against my jumpseat and the R2 exit door, I heard him enter the lavatory and lock the door. I didn't want to have another close encounter with the cup, so I walked up to the forward galley where the other three flight attendants were eating. 

Ten minutes later, flight attendant #4 and I walked back to the back galley to prepare for landing, which included lavatory checks. She opened the door.

"Oh, someone left a cup in here on the vanity."

I spun around and shouted "NO. DON'T TOUCH IT!"

I took a better look in the lavatory and it was indeed the gentleman's newest urine cup displayed on the vanity for us cabin crew members to find and dispose. I wanted to bring the cup back to its rightful owner, but I thought that taking a picture with it would be a better idea before throwing it away.

Right as I was going to use the forward lavatory after the passengers deplaned, the captain called me into the flight deck.

"Hey, the First Officer and I just want to make sure you have a cup to use."

They were still laughing when I locked the lavatory door shut.